It is with a very furious punching of the keys that I tell you, dear readers, that I had a 20 day cycle this month.
20. Fucking. Days.
I checked my numbers since going off BC, and it’s averaging around 23-24, so I’m not sure what happened this month. Stress? Probably.
I technically now have no clue when I ovulated. I know I had CM indicating ovulation but I didn’t bother to record it.
My concern at this point is that I was diagnosed with PCOS and Hypothyroidism when I was 16. I’ve lost a significant amount of weight, and my BMI (as inaccurate as it is) is at 21.0 right now. SO… I don’t think it’s an issue right now.
But my urge to call my doctor is huge right now and I’m pretty upset.
I don’t know what to do and I don’t know where else to go.
What do you guys think?
The Buddhists say if you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that’s not the one. When you meet your ‘soul mate’ you’ll feel calm. No anxiety, no agitation
"So this is the story of how Hazel Grace Lancaster survives cancer only to have to fight in a post-apocalyptic Chicago?"
TTC cycle #3. Ovulation happened Monday, according to my app so now it’s just a waiting game: Schrödinger’s Pregnancy.
Some time off work will hopefully ease some of the stress and make things a bit more hospitable for a [insert child term here: baby, embryo, parasite, etc].
So. Fingers crossed.
Hormones are a bitch.
Work has been rough lately. There’s a lot of attention on my department and it really falls on my shoulders to perform.
Sometimes I’d really like to just be a cog.
D and I went back and forth today about my worries. Sometimes it’s hard to be married to a guy who is so easy going, who never worries about much.
I lamented about my concern about how the stress from my job may prevent us from getting pregnant.
He responded that I read too many Mommy blogs. (He probably isn’t wrong….)
I want to do well. I want to succeed.
But breaking down into tears because I’m so worried isn’t professional or cool….
Waking up from a nap is like Cap waking up from being frozen.
Skeptical and angry and wtf.
I have zero fucks with which to contribute to society today.